Speechless, in a good way

I am so in awe of our Lord and His timing. Holy cow its like, everytime I rely upon Him to get us through something it works out every time, but each time it comes upon me as the most awesome thing in the world. I never have forgotten how amazing each and every time is, it just seems the more and more it happens I am just that more in awe of Him.

Unfortunatly I cannot divulge details still, but lets just say that if He hadnt worked the timing out for Zac to do something when he did, then he would be out of a job on Friday. but because Zac went with his prayers and did this totally unrelated-to-work thing, they are letting him keep his job and I dont have to worry about where the next rent and truck payment are coming from.

Had Zac not gotten the notion in the first place, (which i might add was COMPLETELY out of the blue, he just got a feeling that he needed to look into it) then he wouldn't have spent so much time praying and pondering with me and the Spirit, and then come Friday disaster would have hit.

I am sooooooooooo thankful for the Lord in our lives, I cant even explain it but it just keeps getting better and better. Sorry for being so vague, I will be more forthcoming eventually. Please send prayers our way and thank the Lord today for all He has blessed you with.

Philippians 4:13

I love staying home. I love being able to get things done. I love being able to have my errands ran and a clean home and a nap if I need it. I love being able to greet my husband at the door when he arrives home and not have to walk in an hour after he has already showered. I love feeling the sense of accomplishment I get when I can get up at 6am and actually have time for my devotions, or listen to a sermon to start my day off right, and then be ready to tackle the day.

Truly, God gives us His strength if we ask. If we just only ask and make the effort to receive it, we can accomplish anything. I find on the days i have to work outside the home, nothing gets done, not even my devotions. I might find some time to sneak in a quick prayer, but hardly much else. But the days when I have all day to tend to my home and my finances and my own well being...those days are the ones I truly cherish because I can feel the Lord working through my hands. I know that He is there answering my call for help in even the tough little itty bitty situations. And then I dont feel as if I have failed if I dont accomplish everything on my to-do list. I dont feel like my kitchen is scolding me for not stepping foot in there, because I had the strength to tackle the mess. I dont dread my husband coming home to see just how much I havent done, because I have had the strength to do it. And best of all... I can wake up at 5:45, get hub off to work and I have the strength and energy to go all day long and not be rushed.

I am so thankful the Lord is in my life and for the strength and clarity He gives me when I am willing to receive it. May we all be strengthened in the wisdom of the Lord. Amen.

Philippians 4:13 - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me

Making an effort

Ok...because I am so dang-gum-it bored, and therefore still in a slight bit of a bad mood, I am going to count my blessings. Ive done this in the past and it seem to have helped.

-I have a loving husband

-I have a loving cat

-My family is supportive of my decisions

-My God has never let me down, even when times are trying

-I always have food on the table

-I am able to see

-I have a growing, kicking baby boy in my tummy

-I have a bed I can go sleep in whenever the mood strikes (except at work)

-My husband has a good job and insurance

-It doesnt snow much up here

-I am able to have a computer to myself

-I am able to have clean laundry

-I have a great sis that is bringing up my kitty

-I have a great supportive church family

Ok, I know that isnt all, but i do feel a teensy bit better. This day just needs to end. 

I cant think of a title.

So today was day 1 of job interviewing. I had one at 10:30 today at Modern Day Mommies, a site from women for women offering women empowerment services. (by that I mean dula's, healthcare, perinatal care, etc.) It turned out to be a position in sales, which wouldnt be so bad, but the company is so green, and it is commission, and I need a job now that is either salary or hourly. So that didnt work out. The lady who heads the company is super nice though, I'd love to work for her. Perhaps down the road. 

Monday is my other interview at Miyamoto International, Structural & Earthquake Engineers. As an admin. assistant, not an engineer. So far this position sounds more like what I am used to and where my skills lay. If they offer it to me I am going to take it. Minimum wage is 8.95 here, and they are offering $12-14 DOE. $14 an hour would be nice. 

I have plastered Vancouver with resumes... exhausting. So I have not ceased praying that the Lord would bless us with a second income, be able to pay off some debt. Not that we have a lot, but it is more that I would prefer to have. I have been really gung-ho after Christmas to find a job and was pretty upset about not finding one last night. So I prayed, and fasted yesterday, and prayed some more. And during the last prayer I heard, "Is it really all about money to you?"

Huh??

Then I heard "You're not looking at the big picture."

What big picture??? (yes I was frusterated at this point.)

So I decided to start looking at the blessings I have. Ok Lord, I said, I have a wonderful husband who has a good job. I have a roof over our heads. I always have food sufficient for our needs.

The small voice continued "Keep going. Your still missing the big picture."

Okaaaayy..... YOU got us up to Vancouver on your will. YOU provided us with everything we need to be safe and comfortable. 

And then it came to me, flooding over me. I have HIM. He who cares so much for us, that He knows of our troubles and our stresses, and even though I am praying to Him, I was still only praying for things that I need in this material world. I needed to pray for the spiritual, to thank Him for being such a loving God. To know that I am a child of His and that when I am in tune with His flow, that the things I need to accomplish will come to pass because I let my guard down and let Him do His thing. 

Dang guards. I get so caught up in the whole mess of the human world that even though I never doubt Him, I still forget that he is my lifeforce and the drive behind my life. 

So needless to say, I am a bit more relaxed, still a little frusterated and stressed, but not nearly as bad. Tonight we are going to a church get together, which maybe will get my mind off of things. Please pray for me. 

We all are so blessed.

God holds us up through every situation we encounter. He never gives us a trial that is too big for us. And while we go through these trials, no matter how discouraged and frusterated we get, when we come out of them we see just how big God is and just how much He loves us. We are finally moved in to our new place and I just wanted to take some time to recount my blessings and bear my testimony.

I know that there is a living God and that He provides for us every second of every day.

I know that Jesus Christs atonement was the greatest sacrifice and that through total selflessness, He saved me.

I know that the power of prayer is true and I know that no prayers go unanswered.

I know that prayers go unanswered for times only to stregnthen our faith in Him.

I know that when things dont go the way you planned, He is pulling you closer to the plan He wants.

I know that God gave us family as the ultimate support system on this Earth.

I know that the Scriptures are true and that God gave us the ultimate handbook/manual for living on this Earth.

I am so blessed that God gave me such a wonderful husband who loves the gospel as much as I do. I am blessed that I have an opportunity every Sunday to go and to worship Him. I am blessed that He has granted my husband and I knowledge and understanding enough that we are able to feel His presence and listen to His direction.

Thank you, Dear Lord, for all thou hast done for us. I thank thee for the direction thou hast pointed us in and that we were able to heed your way. I thank thee O Lord for the peace that thou hast given my family and for the spiritual gifts we have received. Please let me always remember how good thou has been. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Happy with what I have...

Moving this time around has been somewhat of a different thing for me that all the other times. This time, I donated 9 (yes count them nine) black yard sacks of mostly clothes and shoes with little miscellaneous things. It was like giving up smoking! I got so attached to having masses of things (I'm not a hoarder, but I did accumulate quite a bit.) But once I got rid of the first few bags, it got easy! I have enough clothes to wear to work, to church, to dance class and to lounge in, and only 5 pairs of shoes. (black heels, brown heels, tennis shoes, slippers and brown sandals) And I'm still getting rid of things! Its such a good feeling to purge old stuff! My closet is actually clean!!!

The reason I started the purge was my dear husband, who when we took the 9 bags to the D.I., gave me the wide eyed look that plainly said you-are-never-going-shopping-again. (actually it was more like sheer bewilderment as to how I accumulated so much crap) Anyways, he started it because we are going to move to Alaska within the next year or so and are driving up there so we are taking as little as possible. So we said goodbye to our furniture, and our first home, and our decorations, and our comfortable 1500 sqft house, and moved in with some friends in their 19 foot camp trailer where I am forced to only have a small amount of things. Its really really nice to not have so much, and that initial feeling of giving up the stuff we had come to love became only luxuries we realized we could get along without until our Alaska house-goal is reached.

Its definitely harder for me I think because I was extremely spoiled growing up. I'm 22 and my mom is still trying to get rid of the entire Barbie isle from WalMart, and all the stuffed animals and all the junk we accumulated through Christmases and yes, EVERY holiday. Christmas morning would take 4 hours just having us 2 kids open presents at a breakneck pace. My husband on the other hand got a box of cereal for Christmas morning. (That's the way to do it moms... disposable gifts. No clutter!)

So I have made up my mind. Aside from going shopping to re-accommodate my wardrobe for garments after the temple here soon, no more going to Ross on my lunch break... no more eBay shopping... I have and will have plenty of clothes and until they completely fall apart, (which some of them are) I will not go shopping. I am happy that God has blessed me with abundance that I will not freeze. Besides, clothes are a material object, yes necessary, but not in excess. I need to focus more on His word and living for Him and not for the next cutest pair of shoes unless the become a my-old-ones-fell-apart-necessity.

“Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also” - Matthew 6:19-21

O LORD of hosts, blessed is the man that trusteth in thee. - Psalm 84:11-12

I love being a Christian! Know why?? Because God promises that the closer you are to Him and the more you follow His word and commandments, the more blessed you will be. And God does not break His promises!! I truly can testify of His GREATNESS and His love for us!!

We are able to start business now, praise Him! My husband started his own lawn company, and we needed to get a lawn mower and a trimmer. We found out that we weren't able to finance the deal through the company, but thanks be to God, we were able to pay cash for 70% of it and use an existing credit card for the rest rather than having a new credit card account with a HUGE balance on it. His blessings are everywhere and like this one, it is such a small thing but once realized, it turned into a wonderful situation!! I know it worked out also because we did wait for His timing rather than going gung-ho on the situation and get a mower when we felt we needed one. We have and still are learning that things go soooooo much easier and smoother when we step back and use God's time. I do testify to you that His word is the truth and that blessings do come from heeding it. I testify that prayer and patience according to His will is a necessary part of worship and a wonderful way to become closer to Him. Praise be to Him that lets us live! Amen.

A faithful man shall abound with blessings, but he who makes haste to be rich shall not go unpunished. Proverbs 28: 20

In-laws and Outlaws

YAY!!! Praise the Lord my family is at peace!!! Somehow, through Gods good grace and many many many prayers.... my family has reconciled!!! It is as it was before.

Lord, I thank thee for the blessing of family that thou hast given me, that everything is turned right in thine eyes and that I may enjoy this newfound peace. I ask that thou please continue these days of peace and I say these things in the name of the son Jesus Christ, Amen.

"Home is where the heart is"

There really is no place in the world like home. Wherever you call it, that is your spot. Your home is your sanctuary, the one place where whether it is quiet or not, you can still find a quiet spot in your heart for. Its the place after a long day you can flop on the couch and finally breathe, knowing that there will not be any more multi-line phone calls and no deadlines to meet. It is the place where your family, your greatest allies, live and support you. It is the only place you really feel comfortable having a good cry.

I am so thankful for my husband and the place we call home. Yes it gets cluttered and sometimes messy, but it is still that place that I look forward to going every day after work and the place that I hate to leave in the morning to go to work. There are plenty of places in the world I would love to see and even live, but it doesnt matter where we live...wherever my husband and my cat are, that is truly my home.

Couny thy many blessings

I was up late last night just scribbling around in my journal when a memory popped up. At one point several years ago, I had written a list of 100 of my favorite things. So being in a reverent mood, it has inspired me to write a list of all the things I am thankful to be blessed with. I wont do 100, but Im sure I can think of a few things in no particular order aside from the first 2...

*My Lord and Savior

*My Husband - for being with me and putting up with me (wink, wink!)

*My family who has streadfastly stood by me

*The Scriptures

*My home - comfortable rent and a cozy bed

*My job - though I'd rather be a housewife, I am appreciative of the income

*A warm fuzzy kitty that thinks of me as "mom"

*A place to call home when everywhere else is sucking

*Being able to take trips and go places

*That God has blessed our finances that we are stable and happy

*For the Atonement of Christ that myself and all others may be redeemed

*For all the people who have touched my life and my thoughts and have turned them toward Heavenly Father and Godly things.

*For the Temple and the peace that it has brought to our home.

Pity-party anyone? I'll bring the pity...

Hopelessness, despair, exasperation....utter aauugghh....It is days like this that my faith is tested. So is my patience. I seem to have this problem of running away from my problems instead of addressing them with God. I know that should be the first thing I should do when I feel like this, but my first actual action is to sit and cry, wonder what I'm going to do and then get angry at why things arent working the way I want. Dont get me wrong, I trust my Lord, but sometimes my negative emotions get in the way of His positive light. Ever have a good bad mood? I used to love those, but through my studies I have realized there is no point of being and staying in a bad mood because God is there to love us, and to help us through our trials and through our trials we either choose to grow closer or farther away to Him. So why o why does it take me so long to snap out of it? Sometimes it feels like by reading and praying I am holding my anger and sorrow in. I suppose the most important thing is that i need to more fully realize that He is there for me and that I need to remember to be greatful for that. And that things are not supposed to go my way. God has his ways of dealing with situations and I need to just be the spectator. I am learning. Jesus didnt say it would be easy, but I do ask for His mercy. It does uplift my moods listening to songs of praise, just to get back into the frame of a Godly mind. It is comforting to know that kneeling down can take away all your pain. He really is a generous and kind Father and I do owe him my undying thanks. The trials may not be easy and may last a month or maybe just a day, but to have Him as your army as well as commanding officer, no matter what you have already won the war. Psalm 30:2 - O Lord my God, I called to you for help and you healed me