I feel like a proud mama.

**thats not my husband... just a photo.**

My husband is joining the competitive Paintball Team at Boise State this year. A quarter of me is a little perturbed, only because practice is on Sundays scheduled at the same time we go to church. However, in January, our church time changes, so it wouldnt be for that long. The other three-quwarters of me is thrilled because he is getting into something and being an active participant in something he loves to do. College has changed him, I've watched him grow up in a matter of months. Its amazing. The drive he has now is so sexy. (TMI, I know. Sorry.)

I am so proud of him that he is taking college upon himself to succeed and be the best he can, and to get involved in a hobby that he enjoys. And I am more than happy to support him in his endeavors with my love as well as financially. 

I just hope I am able to travel to the competitions with him, A) because I want to cheer him on, and B) because I am the biggest weenie in the world when he is gone. Heellllooo anxiety!! Especially if he has to compete outside the Pacific North West. I just worry. But I think he will have an absolute blast doing this! 

A new cooking site I enjoy

www.tastespotting.com

Layoff season again. (But not for me, praise Him!)

At this point, I dont care who gets to be president. I shouldnt say that, I mean whatever happens, I just hope the economy does something good. My new job just laid off 2 employees that have been there for a very very long time. Which is a suprise because had I known layoffs were going to happen, I would have guessed it would have been me, just because I was the newest to the group. But apparently, they sat me down and told me that they really like me, want to keep me on, and it is the drive and motivation and good attitude I have, and also the efficiency factor I have that is really working for me. (good to know..) Also, we have cut the janitorial service and they are hiring me on a few days a week in the mornings before work for more pay... (I'll take that) 

My point in saying I dont care who's president is just me wishing that something would happen for the better. We vote here shortly, and I am no psychic so I cant predict who is going to win. I just hope that there is hope for either McCain or Obama. And yes I realize the differences between the two, I've watched the debates and have formed my own opinions, but I cant change things. Whoever wins, wins. I just pray that America has a fighting chance with either one. 

And I praise God that I still have a job, and that He is still providing for my family.

Notes from Maya Angelou

I like this post from A Wise Woman Builds Her Home (link at right) who took it from Clothesline Alley:

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."
I'm whispering "I was lost," Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say..."I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect.
My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not holier than thou.
I was a simple sinner who received God's good grace, somehow.

~Maya Angelou

Hardy-har-har. So funny I forgot to laugh.

Ha. Ha. Ha. Dont make me laugh. I have been worried about nothing apparently. My last two posts were me being wendy-worry-wart about coaching a highschool dance team. Well, I talked to a couple of current coaches at other highschools, and some that have previously coached at others... guess how much they make a month...

Can you guess??

Ok wait for it....

$300 a month!!!!!!!!!! 

That would buy me gas. Thats it. I cant believe the school districts get away with paying $300 a month for a butt-load of time spent in the wee hours of the morning, trying to figure out bussing to competitions, trying to budget for costumes, trying to get the board of administrators to even give you funding for a bus, dealing with parents, and a whole slew of other things that take up ALL of your spare time. Not to mention I'd be coming from East Boise. 

What a waste. So the guy is going to call tomorrow regardless, and unless I can get $1000 or more a month (yeah right) then darn it, I wont do it. 

If that is all they are paying, then this is a job for a wife who doesnt have work who is local. Perhaps if this job was in Boise, then I would try and haggle for $500 a month, but whatever. 

Screw this idea. Thanks for the support everyone... Its good to know I've got good people to bounce ideas off of. 

My mind is going to kill me one day.

Ok so this is in regard to my last post, because I still havent decided that if they give me the job that I even want the job. 

I am worried that it will take too much out of my role as being a wife. Yes I realize I only really see hubby on weekends and nights, and that wont change, but I am scared that the extra time I have being awake will numb me to doing my wifely duties and being there for my husband. I dont want my work to get in the way of our relationship. He doesnt think anything will change other than I would be getting up earlier. He may be right. But I am a scaredy cat when it comes to change especially when it involves my relationship with him.

However maybe he is right, nothing will change other than I'd be a mite tired than usual. He is already set on doing the cleaning and having dinner ready when I come home, a bit of reverse roles there, but I'm not worried about that. It would help alot. Besides when he is done with school, the job market for his degree pays well enough that I would never have to work again in my life. And this whole Dance team thing is only until April, so... 6 months? And its not like I'd have to travel. 

So here is me, if you havent guessed it already: a freakin worry-wart who feels guilty for stupid things like this with anxiety. I'm such a weenie. It means alot to me to be able to be a good christian wife to my husband, but I've almost come to the conclusion that until I get out of the working world, I can only function at 10% homemaker. I think too much.

Although the bottom line is: if they dont pay at least somewhere around $1000/ month, then its an automatic no-go no matter what. I will not do this as a volunteer effort. It must be the equivalent of being a second income that affords the gas back and forth every day. That is the deciding factor on if I consider the job or not. I just need to stop thinking about it until I find out the details on Tuesday.

Oh what a pickle.

A new dilemma has shown up. I need advice. Here it is:

Yesterday about 1pm, I get a text message from one of the highschool girls I teach in ballet class that says "would you want to coach Columbia HS dance team?" Ummm...YEAH! So I call her and ask whats going on... apparently the 2 coaches, (who apparently the school, parents and dancers have all very much disliked for 3 years) just up an left at noon. I dont know the exact reason why yet... Im going to ask. So Columbia Dance Team is coachless. So I called the athletic director and he will get back to me on Tuesday when school resumes, so i dont have this job for sure, its just a huge commitment so I have to think if I even want to consider taking it.. (apparently the entire state of Idaho is off for 5 days.) My husband was the one who got the text and called me and said you better jump on this... 

Here's what I know: I have been dancing since I was 4, I was on Skyview HS danceteam, I teach at a studio now. 70% of the team at columbia I teach at the studio. I have a blast teaching in general, and dance team coaching has been something I have wanted to do for ages!

Here's what I also have to consider: Practice is in Nampa, 20 miles away from 6-7:15ish in the morning Mon-Fri (unless I schedule otherwise), I have to be back in Downtown Boise at 8am to work until 5, I would most likely be in charge of an athletic budget, I would have to deal with parents, and I would have to coordinate competition schedules/fundraisers/basketball season.

Having said that: I wake up early anyways, and the drive to nampa without traffic takes 20 minutes, the drive back if i take Victory Rd would put be at work a little before 8am, I am already the bookeeper and accountant for my husbands business and my inlaws so I'm not scared of a budget, parents are like difficult clients that come into the office - just gotta deal with them, and the 2 ladies that own my studio I have known since I was 4 and one has taught Vallivue HS Dance team for over 25 years and is a judge for all the competitions, and the other is the rules and regulations coordinator for all the Idaho sector danceteams so I have a good support backing. And my day would be over at 5pm and I would get to go home to hubby as normal. I wouldnt have to choreograph all the dances, I can bring in choreographers... so thats a load off.

My only hang-up: I get sick easy. If I dont eat right and sleep enough, I get sick. If I were to take this, my day would start at 5am and end at 5pm...thats a 12 hour work day, then 5 more hours awake at home with hubby. And if I got sick, there would really be no "sick days". Zac already said he is supporting me completely in this if I want to do it, he wants me to do it.  He said he'd clean and cook and help me out with dance team stuff if needed. He would also help me stay on track of a high-protien, high-energy diet that incuded supplements to keep me healthy since I would be on the go for 12 hours straight. So far that is my only hang up. 

I would get paid, Im not sure how much just yet, as I said, I have to wait until Tuesday to find out all the details, but it would be like having a second income again, which would put me at ease. Zac would get a job, but his school hours at the University are so sporadic and long that no one will take him. Which is more than fine with me, he is going to school so he can one day support me and our kids, not just sitting on his butt while I work forever. And he works hard at school too. Im so proud.  

So anyways... thats my dilemma. I talked to the lady at my studio who coaches Vallievue, she said its alot of work and its fun. My mom, who was a dance team mom thinks I'm nuts because she hated it when I and my sis were on the team, because she was the only pro-active parent...

 I really really want to do this.  It would be so much fun! I am young and no kids, and have the support of my husband and quite a few others in the dance world... I still have to find out why they 2 coaches quit, although I grew up with them on Skyview Dance team and have my own reasons why still no one likes to work with them. I dont know. Oh! And it would only be until April/May. 

So there is the pickle. I actually feel better about the whole thing now that I typed it out. What do you think?

Easy chicken enchiladas

These turned out great last night! I was purusing a magazine and for once had all the ingredients for a recipe. I dont ever pay attention to how much of anything i put in, so whatever you think is good will work.

Chicken enchiladas

1 12oz can of chicken

3 oz cream cheese

mexican seasonings

lime juice

onions

jalepenos or green chilis

cheddar cheese

tortillas

sour cream

milk

oil

In a skillet, mix together chicken, jalepenos, onions, cream cheese, lime juice, cheese and spices until hot and bubbling. In a small skillet, warm up cooking oil and dip both sides of a tortilla in it, then place in a glass dish. spoon chicken mixture in the middle, roll and place in dish. repeat until you have no more chicken. in a separate bowl, combine sour cream and milk until you get a heavy cream thickness. pour evenly on tortillas. cover with cheddar cheese. Bake at 350 until cheese is golden. 

Turned out great!

Houston, we have a problem...

All circuits are down. Or frazzled at least. Why is it that every month, this time of the month, I feel like the world just spun off its axis and I am being thrown into an oblivion of anxiety and headaches. Sheesh. Can a girl get a break? Can I have just one month of semi-normality when this time occurs? Of course not. Now that I'm over 21, apparently that justifies horrible, awful PMS symptoms. Right now I would kill for the doubling-over crampage of the pre-21 ages, rather than have this psycho-spinning-my-world-is-ending-if-i-dont-get-what-i-want-right-now feeling. I shudder to think what menopause is going to be like. Or even pregnancy. 

On a good note though, it only usually lasts for a day. And today actually isnt that bad. I just got over an awful, awful cold that for some reason involved a fever, was a fun weekend let me tell ya. I took yesterday off from work and just slept. All day. It was nice when I could breathe. 

So that is where I have been hiding out, thought I'd post to say I'm not dead yet. Maybe later I'll think up something inspriational or even interesting. Right now I'm just going to try and make it until 5pm.

So totally random. Forgive me for the boredom.

Today is my husbands 24th birthday. I am such a lucky gal. I suprised him with making his favorite dessert, Peanut Butter Balls, which his mom wont make him anymore... and I was thinking of getting something slinky for tonight, however right now my stomach is saying that eating on my lunch break is more important than going shopping. So far, I am giving into my stomach as I am starving!! I didnt have time to grab breakfast before work this morning, but I've got chocolate protien powder at work for some reason. So I had some of that and man what a taste treat that is. >:P icky. So I've been ransacking our controller's candy dish and the frosting container in the fridge, just waiting to go home and make a grilled chicken sandwich or two. Holy crap I'm hungry. 

Just about anything sounds great right now. Shrimp especially. I think I've got a cold as well... hasnt hit full force yet, but that dang runny nose and sniffing I've had for the past month has finally culminated into ohhhh.... im not feeling very well.... ick. 

I miss my sister. I should call her. I've just been so busy lately with dance and work and laundry and zacs homework. Today is his math final. He was freaking out last night! So we went through his practice test and he knows how to do the problems, he just needs to slow down and double check his work. He needs a 57% to pass the class. I am praying his score is higher than that to boost his confidence a little more. 

I am trying to pass the time right now if you couldnt tell. Also trying to stay awake... It is a lovely day out by the way. It is completely gray and overcast with a cool, damp feel. Hasnt started raining, but I wouldnt mind either way. It reminds me of Alaska and of what I have heard Ireland is like. I wish we had Irish weather. I love the rain and the gloom and the coolness. Occasional sun is nice too, but as long as it is still sweater weather. As much as I am not a huge fan of Idaho, I am very thankful I live here, the south has had multiple storms this year and there is a tropical storm right now raging from the southeast up to new england. Here in Idaho, our most extreme weather happened the other day with 1 inch of rain mixed with hail. Thats it. The only thing that got damaged was those bugs that didnt take shelter quick enough. 

Poop. I've got 15 minutes to go.... my stomach thinks my throat has been cut. Its days like this when I think back to the 2 years I tried to be anorexic and wonder what in the hell I was thinking. I cant not eat now. Holy crap I die if I dont get lunch. Or am able to snack during the day. Right after I get back from lunch my office is celebrating the September birthdays. My coworker made 2 homemade cheesecakes... I guess I cant gorge myself on lunch now, I definetly want room for cheesecake. She made a classic one with strawberry topping and a peanutbutter one with reeses peanut butter cups. Ohhhhh..... I've got to quit talking about food. 

Ok, I've got to do something else before I die from thinking about how hungry I am. 

The cutest little mice ever!!

http://www.house-mouse.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?search=

Another Satisfying List...

Every so often I am inclined to write down a list of things that are comfy and satisfying. I feel another one coming on:

* Oversized sweats

*Gloomy, dark rainstorms

*Tea with just enough cream and sugar

* Cuddling with hubs

* Comfort food! (particularly stuffing. Im a sucker.)

* Clean sheets

* Big fluffy down blankets

* A spotless, bleached down house

* My kitty when he isnt being a turd

* Wednesday night- ice cream date night at TCBY

* Holidays

* 

So its been awhile....

Its been awhile... Thursday I didnt write because I went home from work with a high fever and such bad vertigo... Friday was better but still had a fever. The weird part was that aside from the vertigo, I didnt feel sick at all! Made for a miserable couple days though. 

Fall is here and so is the rain! (finally!) And the hail. We had such a busy weekend...didnt even seem like a weekend at all. Saturday we woke up to the sky pouring buckets. Thunder and lighting were right over us too! We have gone 59 days without rain, and apparently the rain gods are making up for it. There were neighborhoods that were completley flooded If you have read any of my previous posts, Saturday is when we mow all our clients yards. Soooo.... instead of waking up at 6am and leaving, we slept in until about 8:30, and then left for mom-in-laws in hopes that Nampa would be dry. Lol, it wasnt. So we hung out at mom-in-laws house until 1pm, when finally the sky cleared up and the grass had dried out. But by that time, neither of us felt like doing anything at all, plus the BSU vs. Oregon State game was coming on at 1:30. But we figured we'd better earn our pay, so we went. Out of the 9 jobs we had to do, we got 6 done and but the time we had loaded up from the 6th job, the sky clouded over again and poured!!! So we decided we were done for the day, except we still had to dump the grass in our friends pasture for her cows. As we drove there, the raindrops got bigger, and then the hail the size of dimes came down with it. And didnt stop. We sat in the driveway for a second, looked at eachother and said, ready, go! Not two seconds after we got out of the truck, we were soaked as if we just jumped in a swimming pool. So we drag the tarp out of the back of the pickup to the pasture, all the while getting pelted with stones of sharp little ice balls. Can you say ooowwww!!! We head back to mom-in-laws to warm up and shower and eat, and by that time we were both sooo exhausted, we just plopped down on the couch with a pizza and a calzone and we just slugged out and watched the ball game. (we tivo'd it) It was relaxing hanging out, I love this kind of weather, I could do it every day! Just as long as I'm not having to be out in it. I'll watch from the comfort of my heated home in sweats.  But my poor husband has to go after school this afternoon back to nampa and mow the other 3 yards. 

Sunday was perfect temperature, chilly. Went to church and then had to head over to sis-in-laws for other-sis-in-laws kid (our nephew) birthday party. We also celebrated the 4 other birthdays too, which apparently we each needed our own cake for... there is so much cake left.  It was ok as far as get togethers go... there was 23 people there!! Sooo many people. And quite a bit of venting afterwards. We got home at 8pm, and just slugged out and finally went to bed. 

Long weekend that went by fast. This is how the rest of last week has gone. I am still excited that once the end of october hits we can sleep in on Saturdays, I'll miss the income, but free time is fun too. Ok, back to work.

Heartwarming new blog!

I've got another great blog for you ladies out there... I was reading Anna's blog at Domestic Felicity, and she posted it, and now so must I because it is wonderfully heartwarming and uplifting. It is a blog by Lady Lydia at  http://homeliving.blogspot.com. It is also going on my favorites list on the left side of my blog, if you ever need it. Check it out! 

Random Ramblings

Days like this make me wish it was raining. Its not a bad day by any means, dont get me wrong, I'm just comfy. I'm at work ofcourse, but I would love to be in sweats with a cup of tea and some tomato soup at home watching TV while it is pouring out. I guess I'm just a rainy day person. (anyone pick up on that Gordon Lightfoot reference there?? Sneaky, I know.) 

It sure has been a non stop month of September so far. Between mowing at the crack of dawn of Saturdays, to ball games right after, to working 5 days a week, to helping Zac with homework, to teaching dance 30 miles away, and somehow squeezing church and our wednesday night dates in.... quite honestly I dont know how my house is still clean. My poor cat is probably going through withdrawals from not seeing me. 

Dance is going relatively well for having only been 2 weeks. I got a new girl in my older class with a sucky attitude, but oh well. That's her problem. I'm bummed tho!! The next BSU game BSU Vs Louisiana Tech is on a WEDNESDAY NIGHT!! Dangit I teach that night. Suuuuuuucccckk.

I'm tired of seeing Obama and McCain on Cnn. I'm tired of seeing CNN anyways. It's all I can have on the TV at my desk at work so says my boss. I am excited for lunch though, I'm meeting my old coworker Linda today at Moons Kitchen Cafe.. Its a little hole in the wall but oh man... As far as chicken sandwiches go.... they have by far the best swiss mushroom chicken sandwich in Boise. I normally dont get chicken anything at restaurants because they are usually A) overpriced B) dry and stringy C) I have a lot of chicken at home.  But this! Ohhhhh... this is the most flavorful, moist, succulent chicken sandwich I have ever had. And now that is the only thing I get there. Its making me hungry thinking about it. 

We are finally able to pay our taxes Praise the Lord!! And still have money left over! And we will be getting our stimulus check soon too! So by the end of October, if all the mowing clients pay like they are supposed to, added to our $1200 stimulus package, we should end up with about $3000 in the account to see us thorugh the winter. I am quite pleased. 

Work has been amazingly busy lately, days have gone by so fast. I cant believe September is almost over. I gotta get a jump on Christmas gifts. Ok, I have to get the mail now. Maybe I'll have time to write later. 

BSU vs Bowling Green (whatever that is...)

(oh and for those of you bashing the blue turf, let me tell you that it is soooo much easier to see the football on blue! the contrast is so much better when you have nosebleed seats)

So we smashed Bowling Green....20-7 last night!! It was a good game too... not one of those blowouts where it looks like we paired an NFL team against 6-year olds. Both teams were actually fighting for the ball, it was nice to see some competition. (Also cant believe BYU beat UCLA 57-0!!)

This time it was me, hubby, grampa and dad. Was so totally fun. I love having hubby there. He's not a sports buff, neither am I except when it comes to BSU football, but it is a good time. Dad made AWESOME bbq'd roast beef sandwiches. Heres the recipe... get ready moms.... this is sooo easy!

BBQ Roast beef sandwiches:

1 pound sandwich roast beef from the deli

1 bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce

Hoagie buns

Slice the beef, stir in with BBQ sauce, heat up, put on hoagies, serve with chips.

Can you say easy???

I also am exited, my ZEN came in!...(that is the new MP3 player from Creative) Havent gotten to use it yet cuz it takes a bit of time to set up, but the good news is that I get 30 days free UNLIMITED downloads from napster as soon as i sign up, so hubs and I are trying to get the biggest song list going ever. We have 6 gigs to fill up. Lotsa songs. Ok, well I have to get ready for church now, thats the latest.

Another short ode to tea.

There is something to be said about a hot cup of tea after a brisk 2 mile bikeride in the morning. What a comfort for a Friday morning.

Time? Whats that?

Incase you're wondering, I am still working on week 2's webinar for finacial freedom. It has been an amazingly crazy week at work, and then go home to do 3 hours of math homework with hubby, I'm fried. So I'm about 1/2 way done with it and will get it to you when i can. Sorry for the delay!

Creative Juice Soup

I want to write a book. I've always wanted to. I just never got past the 1st page. I tried fiction, that was a bust. My characters ended up doing the same thing in every chapter, and I'm not good with dialogue. When I was in France, I tried a first-hand travel guide for the area I was in, but ended up being fairly unhappy with where I was at the time, that my book reeked of sarcasm and distaste. So I gave that up. Then I thought that perhaps I could use my blog posts as some sort of memior of a mid-town girl from Idaho... but that would be boring, and you can just read my blog if you're that interested. 

It seems that all the good ideas are taken, and that there are soooo many books on every subject. So now my next thought is to write on what I've learned about God and His words... I know thats a tired subject in book-ville, but my own thoughts and experiences are unique, so perhaps it would be a different perspective... I dont know. Please, if you have any ideas, I would love to hear them...

I'd love to be on a best seller list, but I need to write the dang thing first. I think its a good idea. What do you think?

Webinar update

I know I said that this monday would be week 2 of the finacially free webinar, but I have to post it tomorrow. With the weekend as busy as it was, and now back at work I can tell its going to be one of those mondays, I'll get it out to you as quick as i can tomorrow. Thanks!

What a weekend!

Wow I dont think I have ever had a weekend go by so fast. As you may know from my last post, my BDay was Friday. So we didnt end up having grilled cheese, we ended up goin to Twin Dragon Chinese Restaurant. That place has special meaning to us, that was the one place we used to go all the time when we were dating. I got a dinner platter that was waaaay to big for me, so I still have the leftovers in the fridge, which I think I will toss now that I think about it... And then we just went home a hung out. It was a very nice evening.

Saturday, we had to work, and usually we are up at the crack of dawn mowing lawns and we are usually done by noon, but Saturday we slept in until 9am... left at 9:30... went to mom-in-laws to eat and sharpen mower blade until 10:30... mowed a few.... hit the D&B Saturday sale and got Zac some great new pants for welding...mowed a few more...went to Subway.. well, you get the gist of it. We finally finished at 6pm. Loooooonnnggg day. But it got better after that, we went home and took a shower and then headed to Ross for my birthday presents!! I FINALLY have a pair of jeans that aren't grass-stained and make my butt look good. Picked up a hot pair of knee high boots as well, and my darling husband, always thinking of me, went off by himself and picked me up a new can opener and a metal strainer. (which i sorely needed! What a sweetheart.) 

So then Sunday, we slept in, as we always do. It is so nice to have church at 12:30 now rather than 9am... although afterwards you dont have much of an afternoon left. Come January we will rotate back to the 9am meeting though, but that is nice because then the rest of the day is yours. So anywho, we only went to Sacrement meeting and then took off to Nampa to mom-in-laws to put in some alundry before we had to be at my parents for my "party". We went to my parents wehre my dad had an awesome homemade mexican spread (he lived in Mexico for 2 years in college and learned to cook their stuff... oooohhhh man its good!) the best part was my two aunts who I mentioned in my last post came and it was a blast! It was like old times just laughing and having a good old time. I got some cat toys, a spa basket (lotion, sprays, etc.), $50, a 2 gig chip for the Zen MP3 player that hasnt arrived yet and a gift card. It was a great time! 

And now I'm back at work playing catch up on the things I didnt get done last week because our entire server shut down last friday. 

Happy Birrrrthdaaaay toooo meeeeee.....

I dont mean to be a bit self-righteous , for lack of a better word... Its my 23rd birthday and I feel like celebrating. Actually, all I have done in the name of celebrating was buy myself a 50 cent Diet Pepsi from our vending machine before work. (which I left in my car and is probably warm now). It was sweet this morning, Zac leaves a couple hours before I do in the mornings, and before he left he came to say goodbye and wished me a happy birthday. My mom sent me an e-card that is just the cutest stinkin thing, and so did my old office manager. I feel loved.

Tonight we will probably celebrate with a grilled cheese sandwich, as I havent gone shopping yet, and I'm not sure i want to spend the money to go out to eat. Maybe we'll go to Crap in a Sack. (our most endearing term for Jack in the Box.) We are really celebrating on Sunday at my parents. My grandparents will be there, and suprisingly, both sets of aunts and uncles will be there too. Can you say awkward? These people are the source of all bad family politics, but my aunt and uncle are coming in from New Orleans to help celebrate my uncles parents anniversary, which so happens to fall this weekend. I havent seen them since I was 15. My other aunt and uncle are coming in from Spokane to see the other aunt and uncle. I havent seen them since 2004. I'm going to miss my sister, but thats ok... shes got a good excuse. :)

Zac and I decided that from now on, we aren't getting eachother gifts for birthdays, we will just go shopping the weekend of and say whatever we got is from that person. That way, we know that everything fits, they like it and there wont be any issue of "what do you want for your birthday?"

Dance went well on Wenesday! My 1st hour is a bunch of 11 year olds who dont know right from left, and my 2nd class is a bunch of gimps. Ok, ok, I am kidding, Ive got one with a severe learning disability, one with a slipped disc, one with a broken ankle, one with a club foot and two others who havent injured themselves yet. Should go well. Needless to say I am impatiently awaiting my pointe girls in November! They are my elites. 

I dont feel 23, I still feel 22... not like there is a huge difference, but I just thank God that he let me live another year. Sometimes we take the fact that God could pull the plug at any point for granted. I am thankful for all He has given me up to this point. 

Well, I'm off to el-luncho and a warm Diet Pepsi. Have a great day!

 

Sigh.

Does anyone have any good ideas to cure a bad day? Mine is going awful and I have to be at work, but I'm tearing up every 5 seconds and I would like to just go dig a hole and climb in. 

Any ideas?

And it begins again...

Ballet season is upon us folks... yes that means that tonight is my first day back teaching. This year is a bit different than last, I have 2 extra classes to put under my belt. So tonight I begin teaching a middle school intermediate ballet class and after that a highschool beginner class. I am getting nervous though.. for the first class or two the dean of the school sits in and participates. She is really nice, and I've known her since I was 5, but still. I'm nervous that I might screw up. It doesnt help that it is that wonderful time of the month when anxiety rears its ugly head moreso than usual. (TMI, I know.) 

I dont know who I've got in my classes tonight. Thursday nights I go back to teach my beloved pointe classes. (for those of you non-dance folks, thats the toe-shoe, nutcracker kind of stuff) I am really looking forward to my intermediate girls, Ive had them for 2 years already and a couple will move up from the beginner class. I am curious to see who turned 12 this past year and will be in my beginner class. My beginners, every year are just angels! Only because its new to them and the try soooo hard to get everything perfect! My intermediates on the otherhand... lol... they are young highschool. A ton of chatty cathys. But nevertheless we get down to business and they love it so much that by recital, they are awesome.

I am having a hard time this year finding a good pointe song for my intermediates. I have one I want to do, but the vision in my head is with professionals doing it. I could tone it down for them, but it is kindof fast. But last years was fast and they did great. I always give my classes a choice of what song they want to do, and I let them collaborate on moves and stuff to put in the dance. I think it makes it feel like its  more thier own creation than just going to class and having someone bark "do this, do that". So far it has had excellent results for the past 2 years. 

I am in need of new dance gear, but havent found the time or money to fund that. Not that it's imperative, but I'll deal with what I've got. 

Little updates for those who ask...

Linda - this is for you, since I dont know how to get back with you through email... and for anyone else who might be curious...

I never did say how my gall bladder flush went... well ladies and gentlemen... I can honestly say I'd do it again in a heartbeat! (actually I did... Ive done it twice so far) This is the first time in years that I can eat pizza, fried chicken, polish dogs and all that great greasy crap without it coming right back up. So about the experience in case you're wondering....

so that Thursday, all I drank was apple juice so as to let the malic acid of the apples soften the stones for easier passing. I'm not really a big fan of apple juice any more, but I'm sure it will pass. That Friday, I had oatmeal for breakfast and then some canteloupe, nothing with fat in it, and then 2:00pm hit and I was on a fast drinking only 3/4 cups of cold epsom salt water twice until 10pm. (taste treat for ya) Although I must say that after drinking that salt water, your appetite definetly goes away! So 10pm hits.... ugh... time for olive oil and grapefruit juice. The grapefruit actually takes most of the taste away, until the end. They say to drink a sip of coke afterwards to get the taste and texture out of your mouth... take it from me folks... do it. It keeps you from chucking it all back up. So then I went and laid on my right side for 45 minutes.

After that, well, holy crap, no pun intended. although By that time, all the epsom salts have removed everything from your bowels but now instead of stool, you see huge piles of little green shriveled peas. I passed 200 stones on my first try and about 300 on my next. I plan on continuing this method for awhile, since the stones were what was blocking the bile that is needed to process the food I couldnt eat. And it was getting to the point where I almost couldnt eat anything. It is a fair amount of agony for a night, but the day after when everything is passed, I had soooo much energy! I felt so good. And I still do. I'd recommend a night of feeling sick to be able to eat pizza again!

Alright, enough on that, on to that wonderful truck of ours. You'd think in this market economy that people would want to buy the smaller vehicles, a V6 rather than a V8... something with decent mileage. That is our truck. 20 mpg, V6 2 wheel drive, little work truck. Not even the businesses that use those trucks want it. So I have come to the conclusion that God doesnt want us to sell the truck, and I have come to beleive that because every time I get on my high horse about selling it, a week later we desperatly need a pickup. Sooooo.... I gave up on account of a Higher Power.

OHHHH!!! We totally SMOKED Idaho State University on Saturday!!! 49-7!! Oh and that new skybox... if you want the lower seats in the box... your looking at $12,000 per 4 people. If you want to be actually enclosed in the upper level with the restaurant and your own private suite, your looking at $41,000 per 4 people. And the thing that got me was it was PACKED on Saturday. Apparently that is what rich people look like. Here is a small link to what it looks like http://www.idahostatesman.com/260/gallery/468086-a468099-t3.html

In other news... I've learned to walk my cat on a leash... Oh boy, I know... ummm.... it is getting cold here finally. It is sooo nice!! I wish it would rain, but I will take what were getting without complaints. Well, there is a short update for ya... feel free to ask me any more questions!

What does it mean to be financially free and what purpose does money serve?

Keep falsehood and lies far from me;

give me neither poverty nor riches,

but give me only my daily bread.
9 Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you

and say, 'Who is the LORD ?'

Or I may become poor and steal,

and so dishonor the name of my God.

-Proverbs 30:8-9

When you think of being financially free, what do you think of? Lets list a few things: Owing no man anything, Being free to spend your money however you please, Having all power and control over your funds... These things are true in a sense of being "free", however, I have found that to truly be free of something, anything! is to give it to God. Think about it, when you have a burden, do you take it upon yourself to bury it within you and struggle to get the weight off? Or do you submit yourself to Him and ask Him to carry your burden that you may right yourself before Him? The latter is much easier to do, and the right way of doing things! If you really stop to think about it, God created everything we have in the world today. Without some divine inspiration, a single man could not come up with the idea to build a computer, or come up with any intelligent ideas at all. So saying that, God also created money, and thus gave it to us to use. It took me forever to figure this out. Through my studies I have found 4 purposes God gave us money for:

1) To cover our basic needs: ie: food, shelter, clothing, etc. As the proverb above states: give me neither poverty nor riches. God does not want his children to dwell in a state of poverty, as the last part of the proverb verse states Or I may become poor and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God. God allows us to use His money to provide for us and our families. This however doesnt mean that we rack up a ton of debt giving our family excessivly cushy lifestlyes, he asks that we live within our means, so that we dont become so poor we dishonor him by just trying to exist, and that we dont get so rich that the devil's world lets us forget our Dear Lord.

2) Money gives us direction from Him: Have you ever really really wanted something but ended up not being able to come up with the funds? Would that thing be frivolous in God's eyes? I have learned that when God knows we do not need something, He will make the funds unavailable to us and we need to remember to see this as an act of God, that it is not his will for us to have this thing. Too many times I have cursed aloud about why me? why cant I have what I need? When I stopped and realized that perhaps having this thing is not the best thing for me and God is the one taking care of me and my finances, it was so much easier to deal with and to distinguish between wants and need.

3) Money is provided to keep Gods charity going. THe world we live in runs on money. Those who have it thrive in the material sense, and those who dont have it, live in poverty. Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me. -Mark 10:21 How we utilize our money for charity is our decision. We are able to use the funds to buy winter coats for a coat drive, to buy material and make blankets for the homeless shelter, or we can give outright donations to places that need the help. I also am of the opinion that thithing is a form of charity. You are placing your funds in the hands of the church to better the fellowship you attend. However, I have found that God blesses only sincere gifts. If you give out "because I have to..." of "because my church said so", or have a slight grudge when giving your 10% tithing... those are not sincere gifts. WHen you give out of pure love as our Saviour did, you will reap the rewards of Him.

4) And finally, the gift of money shows us just how powerful God is. Have you ever had enough and then it was all taken away from you only for you to find out later that there was a big lesson in all of this? God can take and give freely, after all, He is God. When I got laid off, it was for a good reason, and although I had no idea what was going on, I kept my faith and said, "God, I may not understand your will, but I am willing to subject myself to thee." In that entire 2 months, we were 2 months behind on our bills, our BIG bills, but we never went hungry, and we never gave up on Him. Finally a job opportunity came up and I took it and within a week, things fell into place for us to move to Boise, right next to my work, and and spot opened up for Zac in the welding program at BSU. And the week after, we received such a miraculous blessing from my mother who out of the blue, just felt promptings of the Spirit to catch us up on our bills. And here we are today, we have all that we need, we are happy, and our faith has been set more in stone all due to a lack of funds. He is Alpha and Omega, He gives and takes away. He is the Lord Almighty.

Lord, please help me to remember that it is thou that hast given me money to use. Please let me remember to spend it in a fashion that would please thee and also to keep me out of debt. I humbly say this in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Boise State Football starts tomorrow!

BSU FOOTBALL SEASON BEGINS TOMORROW!!! Woooohhoooooo!! As you can tell, I am an ardent fan. And have been n e since I was like 6 when Dad started getting season tickets for him, grampa, my sis and I. This has been tradition every fall, and each and every fall we always get to the stadium a few hours early to sit and eat at The Ram, we always got the huge nacho platter, and then we'd head over to the game.

I am excited for this year, but in the last year or two, things have changed. My sister is 6 hours away going to the rival college, so she cant go anymore. Grampa seems to be losing interest, he only goes to maybe a quarter of the games, usually giving some dumb excuse, this time he's driving my grandma up to BFE for a flea market. So that leaves dad and me. So now I am happy to say my husband gets to go with us, I enjoy having him everywhere I go. Although now since Granpa doesnt go, and gas prices and food prices and sisters college tuition are up... this is the first year we wont be going to The Ram. I am one who really doesnt like change unless I facilitate it, but there is nothing I can do. It is sad to see traditions die, especially when there is such an emotional attachment to them.

This year, it will be myself, dad and Zac. We will be tailgaiting in the parking lot of The Ram. Dad is going to bring the grill and polish sausages and other yummy stuff, Zac and I are bringing potato salad and stuff to munch on during the game, and we are going to have a great time, regardless of what tradition used to be. I enjoy spending the time with my dad. Thats 99% of the reason I go to the games. I love the games, but I dont get to see my dad very often. Even growing up he was the breadwinner, and usually fairly grumpy or tired after work, so we only saw him on weekends.

Tomorrow we play Idaho State University and we plan to kick butt like usual. This game isnt going to be on ESPN, but if you want to watch it, go to http://www.broncosports.com/

A link for you.

Please click here for an awesome post by Anna at Hope Road.

http://hoperoadblog.com/2008/08/27/antipsalm-23/

4 months until 2009. Already dangit.

I wonder where 2009 will take us. (for starters I can hardly believe that 2009 is almost here.) Once May hits, Zac will be done with his certificate studies and can actually call himself "welder". HOwever he wants to get his AA in welding, which would require another year of school whether taken during the normal school year or during the summer. And the second year he can take anywhere he wants because the classes he would need are just like the English 101 & 102, Math and ect.

I dont know where God will put us in 2009... I will be content wherever He places us. Although yesterday in my daydreamy state, googled the places where Ive heard there are welding jobs.(Perhaps a bit sterotypical) I looked in the Dakotas, Nebraska, Wisconsin, Minnesota... I've never ever had any desire to live in the midwest though. I have always lived either near an ocean or in the mountains. But even if God decides to place us in Alabama or somewhere down there, I will be ok for it would be His will. I would have to get ahold of Anna of Maidens of Worth so she can tell us what are the nice parts of Alabama.

As much as I am antsy to know what is going to happen, it is soooo much easier to let God take His time with us rather than carry the stress of worrying about finding a job, where do we live, so on and so forth. I am so thankful He is there to guide us down His direct path and that we are not alone in our wanderings.

Wherever we go, I would want lots of rain! And lots of trees. And preferably mountains, or large hills. Canada would be cool... expensive, but cool. Alaska would be the ultimate though. Zac would be the happiest there, but we will see. For now we are just enjoying our time in Southeast Boise, tucked away in our little neck of Parkcenter. And I cant tell you how excited I am for Thanksgiving and Christmas!!! My favorite times of the year. Perfect weather, spices, hot food, hot cider, warm cozy atmospheres, sweaters & scarves, football games.... I could go on forever. Gives me the warm fuzzies! I should get back to work before my imagination takes over too much.

Please pray for these poor families!!

Last night there was a horrendous fire in South East Boise, thankfully more south from us, (we live in southeast boise, but still.... 9 homes were completley devoured by the fire, one woman died and there are many displaced and destitute familys now. One man made it out with the clothes on his back and didnt even have time to grab his shoes. This has been a major tradjedy for Boise, please send your prayers for these familys who got out with nothing but their lives.

Here is a link to the broadcast and photos and such:

http://www.ktvb.com/news/localnews/stories/ktvbn-aug2508-major_fire.117ce9e5.html

FInance "webinar" starts next monday, not this monday...

Im not sure how i overlooked this, but that finance "webinar" I am going to start weekly I meant to say the 1st monday in september, come to realize what I wrote inplied yesterday, which is a week away from the 1st of september. sorry for the confusion. :)

Another treasure find..

I've discovered yet another new blog, Emily at Unfurling Flower has partnered up with two of her best friends to form A Path Less Followed. It's only just begun, but the few posts on it are pure inspiration and full of thought provoking items. Check it out!

Please read this poem, It is really good from a Christian perspective

In our Sunday School class today, we received a poem. It touched my heart and soul completely to the point of a feeling of warm fuzzies. This poem is something that we as Christians need to keep in mind as we go about our lives and sharing the Gospel of Christ, especially for our youth. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do.

The Bridge Builder
by William Allen Dromgoole

An old man, going a lone highway,
Came at the evening, cold and gray,
To a chasm, vast and deep and wide,
Through which was flowing a sullen tide.

The old man crossed in the twilight dim,
The sullen stream had no fears for him,
But he turned when safe on the other side,
And built a bridge to span the tide.

"Old man," said a fellow pilgrim near,
"You are wasting your strength with building here,
Your journey will end with the ending day,
You never again must pass this way;

"You have crossed a chasm, deep and wide--
Why build you a bridge at the eventide?"
The builder lifted his old gray head:
"Good friend, in the path I have come," he said,

"There followeth after me today,
A youth whose feet must pass this way.
This chasm that has been naught to me,
To that fair-haired youth may pitfall be.

"He too must cross in the twilight dim,
Good friend, I am building the bridge for him."


I get goosebumps every time I read this.

God gave us money... and yet we spend it like its ours.

Starting Monday, I am going to start posting an 11 week webinar of how to handle God's money and become financially free. This is a subject I am passionate about, as you can imagine it would be nice to not owe anything to anyone. I am so close to getting there that I am so excited that I want to share with you what I have learned through bible study and prayer on this subject. Keep in mind this isnt a professional seminar of anykind, just my experiences from being hopelessly in debt to financially stable. I hope you'll join me. Also, I'd love feedback if you've got a good way of doing things or any input whatsoever. It is good to start young, however I believe a person in any stage of life can put their debts aside provided that God's money is placed back in the right hands.

Here are the weekly topics:

Week 1. What does it mean to be financially free and what purpose does money serve.

Week 2. Financial traps, false notions and God's view of the wrong way to go about money.

Week 3. Serving God vs. Serving Manna and Tithing

Week 4. Make a promise to God to stay out of debt and live within your means

Week 5. Credit cards, loans, interest rates and salesmen

Week 6. Is this the best price? and good debt vs. bad debt

Week 7. Lending and co-signing no-no's

Week 8. What does your signature say about your relationship with God

Week 9. Praying for money...why it doesnt usually work.

Week 10. Slothfulness...the undoing on a good financial system

Week 11. Prepare for an everlasting financial heritage

I do hope you'll join me!

Another year passed already??

I just realized my birthday is coming up in a few weeks. Its funny how as you get older, the more you just dont pay attention to it. I almost forgot! When I was little, I remember looking at the adults thinking they were nuts...how could you forget your own birthday?? Maybe it was all the pomp and procession we got as kids, with the balloons, party favors and as many friends as mom could fit in the living room that made it so special for a little kid. I think the last time I actually celebrated with friends and had a party was when I was 12. And i've noticed that even though my parents still throw me a "family" party, as the years go by it slowly has turned into "dinner-on-your-birthday". Which is fine by me. I'll take prime rib and a nap any day!

So I started a running list of things I could possibly want for my bday. After all, thats been tradition since I could write. It made me laugh as to what I came up with:

1. Tires

2. Tire alignment

3. Tune up

4. Fridge Calendar

5. Fridge Magnets

6. Kitchen Towels

7. MP3 player

I cant imagine how dull my list will be when I have kids. (socks, knitting needles, geritol...) It just made me laugh because way back when, even a few years ago, all I wanted was clothes, girly stuff and misc. junk. And now there is no point, because if the things aren't practical, then they are just something else that is going to clutter things up. Maybe its just part of growing up.

I remember at Christmas and birthdays for my parents, what dull, not fun things we got them. We always got my father spatulas or dish towels as he was head chef of the family. How boring I thought. But now I would kill for some new spatulas and dish towels!! ( I know I can go get them myself, I just havent got there yet.)

I guess my point is that I've got to grow up sometime and when you start you dont even realize it until something like this flys out of the blue. I am almost starting to feel old, but 23 is still really young I know. I'm just excited for prime rib.

New Treasures

I've added a few great new blogs to my Faves list! I've added MerelyMiriam... she is the best friend and co-author of Anna of Maidens of Worth. I've also added Not Her Own, who is the sister of Anna of Maidens of Worth, and Bethanys Blog, who I stumbled upon by accident.

All three of these are such welcoming, wonderful blogs and are really interesting to read too! Check them out!

I've got a new dream...

Yes, I love to let my thoughts wander into daydreams. The daydreams I am the most passionate about usually end up becoming reality, because I love the dream so much I just have to get it manifested. Here is my newest one...

So Zac will finish welding school in May. He would get an awesome job from a referral that takes us out of state, (at this point I dont really care where) and his income would be enough to support both of us. So we'd move and settle into a cozy little place and while he is at work, I would get a part time job at a coffee shop or something small like that to take up some afternoon time, and on my down time I'd go explore the town and surrounding areas since they'd be so new. It'd be like an adventure. Zac would work the job he actually loves until evening and then come home to an already clean house and a hot homemade meal and an awaiting wife. And then after awhile of being able to save money, we'd move to Alaska and call it a day.

I love day dreams. They are so fun because you can hash out any situation however you want and it can be perfect. Please dont get the idea that I dont ever live in the present reality, thats what I do for a living. Daydreams are just my Zen. My candlelit bath. It is a place I can go to just kick back and relax. And the great thing is, is that when I come out of it, my reality doesnt seem any worse or better than before the dream. It's my own private getaway.

And it also fosters ways of thinking that are proactive. When I see myself in a daydream of something that I want to happen, I can retrace my "dream steps" and see how I got there and then mull it over to whether or not it would be feasable to use in real life to get there.

I love that God gave us imagination.

Im such a sucker

I know this doesnt seem like it should be a huge deal, but I get to bring my kitty home!! I worked out a deal with my landlord to make payments for the pet deposit and I can and I'm bringing baby cat home!

Now I realize he is an animal, but I get really attached. And I think it doesnt help that he is pretty attached to me too. Its really like living with a furry two year old. You cant go anywhere in the house without him, I cant even use the bathroom without him wondering why i closed the door and left him on the other side of it. Going on vacation is a whole nother story. (does that last part of that sentace look right?? I dont think Ive ever typed that phrase before.)

Pets are such a comfort to some people, and I am such a sucker. Not to mention he is a big ol' fluffball and hes so cute. I had a photo somewhere I thought, but I guess not. I'll post him later.

Im such a sucker for cute little furballs. Especially the little guys. It would be my ultimate downfall. If the world were ending and I was the only one able to save it, all my adversary would have to do is show me a kitten or a tiny bunny or whatever and this world would be toast. Im such a sucker.

We all are so blessed.

God holds us up through every situation we encounter. He never gives us a trial that is too big for us. And while we go through these trials, no matter how discouraged and frusterated we get, when we come out of them we see just how big God is and just how much He loves us. We are finally moved in to our new place and I just wanted to take some time to recount my blessings and bear my testimony.

I know that there is a living God and that He provides for us every second of every day.

I know that Jesus Christs atonement was the greatest sacrifice and that through total selflessness, He saved me.

I know that the power of prayer is true and I know that no prayers go unanswered.

I know that prayers go unanswered for times only to stregnthen our faith in Him.

I know that when things dont go the way you planned, He is pulling you closer to the plan He wants.

I know that God gave us family as the ultimate support system on this Earth.

I know that the Scriptures are true and that God gave us the ultimate handbook/manual for living on this Earth.

I am so blessed that God gave me such a wonderful husband who loves the gospel as much as I do. I am blessed that I have an opportunity every Sunday to go and to worship Him. I am blessed that He has granted my husband and I knowledge and understanding enough that we are able to feel His presence and listen to His direction.

Thank you, Dear Lord, for all thou hast done for us. I thank thee for the direction thou hast pointed us in and that we were able to heed your way. I thank thee O Lord for the peace that thou hast given my family and for the spiritual gifts we have received. Please let me always remember how good thou has been. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Awesome weekend.

What an awesome weekend. Friday we were house sitting for my inlaws, and we just plopped outselves on the couch with a frozen pizza, coke and ice cream and watched the opening ceremony for the Olympics. WOW. The Chinese are freakin amazing. So we went to bed late and then Saturday (my favorite day of this weekend) we layed in bed aaallll day long! And watched the olympics. Its really hard to get out of my mother in laws bed because they have a memory foam matress topper, I cant tell you the last time I slept so well. So we lazed around and got into the volleyball matches, I still cant tell you how to play, but it got tense! We finally got up at about 5:30 and got our bikes and left for Boise to ride the greenbelt to see what the fastest way to work and BSU was.

Then it was home to our normal home for church in the morning. After church however, I must have gotten some kind of food poisening, because from 1:30-6pm I was throwing up, laying on the bathroom floor, my face was completely swollen up, etc... I now still am having some sinus issues and a sore throat and my back hurts like crazy from throwing up, but aside from all that, I would do that weekend over again in a heartbeat!!

I finally found out my dance schedule. I start September 3rd, Wednesdays are my beginner ballet girls and my intermediate highschool from 6-8pm and Thursdays are my (yay!) beginner and intermediate pointe classes from 7-8pm. Im excited.

And thats the weekend report, I've got to get workin.

WE GOT IT!!

(This is the apartment building. Their photos really didnt do the place justice.)

Ok we are almost officially Boiseans. I say almost because we dont get our key to our apartment until Tuesday. As much as I am not a big-city kind of person, (not like Boise is huge or anything) I am excited to live so close to work. And to have such a great place to live! It really doesnt feel like your in the middle of down town, so I like it.

And I am soooooooo happy we qualified for a $0 deposit!!! That means we've only got first months rent to deal with. YAY! And ofcourse we'll bring Stinky along.

Were house sitting for my inlaws this weekend, so no packing is going to get done, but whatever. We dont have that much anyways. Now we have to find out what ward were in.

Suze is back on top of it!

Oh I feel better. I just dont get it. Oh well, thanks Anna, I feel better knowing I'm not the only one who feels like thier going absolutly nuts once in awhile!

So my mind is clear, I have my drive back and I've got plenty more energy. I got to go to lunch with my husband yesterday, today I'm going to Chef Lou's with Cecelia, and tomorrow I'm going to Lindy's with my friend Linda. Busy lunch schedule.

I think were pretty close to getting our apartment... I have to call back this afternoon to find out more info. I just wish it would get over it. I've never had an apartment take so dang long. O well. Patience, grasshopper. I am imagining myself in the apartment, it is such a nice layout with large windows and out all of them all you see is trees!! Which is a nice change considering its in the middle of the biggest city in Idaho. It feels like a resort on the outside, and a cabin retreat on the inside. Full bathroom and full kitchen! (including diswasher and disposal!!!) I've never had one of those outside of my parents house.

I'm starving. I keep looking at Chef Lou's menu with photos.. it doesnt help that my office is right over top P.F. Changs (chinese) and Protos (pizza). We get thier lunch smell up the air vents everyday. Right now it smells like a garlicky chicken/noodle chinese something but it is making my stomach rumble.

Its a good day. :)

Falling off the motivation train.

I've noticed that when I get to feeling all out of sorts like yesterday, the rest of my life falls apart too. Well not that bad, but things get crazy. Like I cant find time or the motivation to read scriptures, my house gets to be a disaster in a matter of .0089 seconds, and I find myself not wanting to do crap but laze around and sleep. And then when I finally realize whats going on, then usually I've got to go back and do damage control.

But, praise the Lord, I am able to realize these times faster each time they happen, so less damage is done. (by damage i mean messy rooms, lack of motivaiton...) I also have found this comes as a result of not enough sleep. (guilty.)

But even though my lack of motivation for prayer and scriptures is present, I still know He is around waiting for me to come back to life. I still listen to the daily devotionals in the car ride to work, and the hymns on the way home, and my husband and I still pray at night, its just the fervor I normally have for His word and teachings just kind of goes "poof!" I know these are only temporary feelings, but man... I just want to sleep.

I am coming out of this phase today, as I am realizing what went on yesterday and I've got some residual from yesterday with me today. I am perking up as I realize that I must do damage control again, although I must say this is the shortest apathy-gig I've ever been on, which is a good thing. Does anyone else ever feel this way?

Simple Truths

So anxiety, nausea, headaches and that dreaded "end of the world" feeling came over me today at lunch. I know this is mostly due to that wonderful hormonal time of the month when all womankind go a little (or alot) stir crazy and nothing makes sense. However, this was a little different in that I havent ever gotten this bad. I felt so completley gone. My body was jittery and twitching, but my mind was gone. Just no real emotion other than sadness and despair, I felt, well, like crap to put it midly. And for no good reason.

So I went to the Pita Pit and got my pita and then went and sat down in the secluded little park area of the US Bank building grounds. I sat and ate my pita wanting to cry the entire time. After my pita was gone, I had a half hour to kill. So I got out a piece of paper from my purse and started writing down everything I was feeling at that moment, trying to sort out what I was feeling and perhaps why. Anxiety. Nausea. Fear of losing everything, Extreme Fatigue...the list went on. And as I got to the end of the paper, It was like someone slapped me upside the head, I heard very clearly that still small voice saying Stop That! and turn the paper over.

Well, ok so I did. Then I heard Joy! Happiness! Love! So I wrote those down. Then I heard Have You Cried Yet? Huh?? Well, no I havent. Since my layoff I've had to be the strong one so I didnt even get to cry over that, and then with the school deal and moving and so on and whatnot, I told myself I didnt have time to cry. And it suprised me a bit, that when I heard the still small voice ask me that question, and I answered out loud a small "no." , the water works just started flowing.

And it felt good. Really good. Its amazing that Jesus knows what you need when you need it and apparantly I have been so locked up in being stressed and overwhelmed, that the second I got vulnerable and had a spare minute to relax, He finally got to hit me with that proverbial ton of bricks. And while I was crying and then a little after I felt His presence so strongly, like I was being wrapped up in a big blanket of love.

I feel bad that I allowed myself to get so wrapped up in the material world of stress and despair, not to mention the hormones being a wonderful amplifyer of that crap, that I wasnt able to allow my Saviour in and I couldnt hear the voice of the Holy Ghost. But He came just when I needed Him.

It was a great lesson to me that I need to remember that I am a daughter of God and He is there for me, no matter how stressed I am. He never gives you task that you cannot do, albeit some may be a challenge. Thank you Lord!!

Time?? Whats that?

HOLY CRAPOLA. I dont think I have been this busy for a very long time. My days at work fly by, and my nights seem like 5 minutes. This is the first time I have found a spare moment to blog! Jeepers.

Well, the search for an apartment is continuing.. we have found a few places to look at on Saturday since both of us will be in Boise anyways... I am still trying to figure out student loans and whatnot. BSU wont talk to me about it until they have a signed release form, which should arrive there today, and the lady Zac went to talk to last Monday isnt returning my calls.

Then there was this grand idea of camping in Glacier National Park by RV, but that was too expensive, so we i guess were going to tent it. But as luck would have it, Zac has orientation that week and if he misses it then he is dropped from the class... soooooo......

Taxes will be paid off this month!! YAY! and our stimulus package should arrive by end of August I hope. And then I can be relieved about that and just focus on paying my normal bills.

I spend my lunch hours roaming downtown Boise, since I work in the heart of it. So far the only thing I can afford down here is a Steak Pita with Tatziki sauce. Apparently people actually pay $300 for black tank tops that dont even come down to hip level. Apparently everyone in Boise makes $100K a year except me. Theres not even a Target or a Walmart close. So I just walk. Need to get my butt into shape anywho.

Life is good and God has blessed us immensly. I am so thankful for the direction He is turning us and that we are realizing that when we just let Him do His thing, every little detail is worked out for us. I am cat-sitting for my friend this weekend while she is in Salt Lake at a wedding, and somehow I am squeezing bookkeeping in there. (again, whats time?)

I'm really jonesin for a new purse, I hate mine. So non-functional and unpractical, but like I said above, I cant find one down here for under $20 that doesnt look like a plastic grocery bag. I'm suprised Winco down here doesnt charge $20 for their grocery sacs. Although everyone in this city is tree-hugging, dirt-worshipping, GREEN yuppies and/or hippies, so I am about the only one who still uses plastic. Everyone here uses the GREEN canvas REUSABLE bags. Which I'm sorry, but I have too much stuff to remember to take to work every day to remember to bring my 8 GREEN CANVAS REUSABLE bags. Especially when I walk 9 blocks to the grocery store on lunch in heels. Not gonna happen.

Ok I think that is a fairly thorough update for now. Yeesh. Back to work.

Oh great CNN....

Tell me why John McCain wearing a band aid on his forehead is news. Are we really running out of things to report?

Submitting to God means that I can breathe!!

God has touched my husband. In saying that, I mean taht my husband is hearing the Lord and the promptings of the Holy Ghost. He is suprising the heck out of me with knowledge and answers that can only come from the highest of beings.

I had been starting to freak out about his moving to alaska thing, and then in the car the other day, we were talking about him applying to BSU. He said he was excited and it felt right to do it... huh??? so I repeated back to him what he just said (more out of disbelief..) and he said that he had been fighting so hard to go to Alaska that God had to fire me to get him to see that the Lord doesnt want us to go to Alaska just yet. (this is a HUGE jaw dropping experience for me)

Wow. And again last night we were talking about school and I was telling him that I was unbelievably stressed out about it and he interuppted me and asked so what do you want to do if I dont get in since we are so close to the deadline? And I asked him, you're not going to blowup the world if you dont get in?? And he is fine with it!! He shrugged it off!! He is fine with hanging around here and saving and perhaps moving somewhere else and going to school.

Just when I think I know all the ins and outs of my husband he totally throws me for a loop. Im just excited that he is submitting to Gods will and knowing that God will provide no matter what.

Now I just need to sit back and remember that. I'm still a bit nervous about his enrollment, but I am much more calm. Lord, thank you for giving me such a wonderful husband!!