**this is part of the town where we are trying to move**
I feel like I am getting old. I am only 22, but it feels like Im running behind everyone my age. Everyone I know is settled in a home with a husband and at least 1 kid. I've got the husband part down. Maybe its because Nampa is such a small town and no one leaves. I went to highschool with people whos grandparents went to school in that town. I'll be turning 23 this year and its kinda scary. Makes me think about wow, I've been out of highschool for 6 years, and I will be 30 in 7 years. We better start having kids now before we get too old to run after them... we want 2-3 at 2 years apart. When we move to Alaska I think is when we would entertain the idea more. We both would like to start now, but things are way too up in the air to make that kind of commitment. I hope Alaska comes soon.
I am in desperate need to pray harder about that. Im so scared that we wont qualify for a loan and then we wont be able to move, or we will have to wait. I just dont want to disappoint anyone. I tell ya though, this whole thing is stressing me out more than ever. I am working so hard to try to make everything come together that I seem to have got it in my head that I cant relax until we get there. And its taking a toll on my health I know, but I dont know what else to do about it except pray and even then I only seem to get temporary comfort. I do know that we are working with God's time and if it is something that He wants us to do then we will go along with it and if not then we wont force it. It's just hard to remember that. I want a place to call our own sooo bad! I am tired of moving so much. I want a place to decorate, where I can bake and keep tidy and have kids running around. I am not saying Im not thankful for all the places God has led us to stay because each one has been a blessing in itself and my home is wherever my husband and cat are, I just would like to stay put for awhile. Writing it down makes me feel a bit better... but October is so close!! And I'll be 23 in September! I feel old.
Time to buckle down and pray my little brains out.
