Take the damn M&M's away from me now. Please.

Hello once more. Technical issues had arisen this past little bit so everything I wrote was not saved. O well.

We made it through Christmas - was nice. I've been digging my nose into the Little House on the Prairie books the past couple days and boy has it sparked my day dreams!!! Back then to own land, all you had to do was ask the government for a plot and then sustain your self for 5 years on it to prove to the government that you could hack it and then the title was yours. How freaking wonderful would that be???

I've really been wishing that it was 1870 or so - Have your own claim, work hard to make your land fruitful, owe nothing to anyone and be oh so much more responsible at a younger age. Laura Ingalls got married at18, but was already teaching school by the time she was 15. I am getting a wandering twitch to find somewhere like that where we were self sufficient. I realize that there were hard times and I am daydreaming about the good ones - not accounting for storms or crop failure...still. I just hate feeling so overwhelmed at everyday life of the expectations the world has put on us. We are so inundated with "new" things that we just have to have, who has the better car, who makes more, etc. Sometimes I really don't think I would mind being an 1870's housewife...I had a wierd dream the other night, that some fundamentalist was elected president, but he had absolute power. And the first law he gave was that every car be destroyed and replaced with horses or oxen and buggys or cutters and that the only clothing style allowed was that of the 1800's. (Keep in mind this dream was before I started reading the books.)

So now for something completely different... I am staying up late again tonight. Zac is out with the boys somewhere and I am the only one up. Well, not holed up in my bedroom purusing Facebook. (that would be my sister.) Stole a jalepeno cheeto from her...mucho good-o.

I really dont have anything good to say, I'm just rambling like every other post I have written. I am in limbo on the anxiety level - I just cant seem to make up my mind whether or not to have full blown anxiety or be fine. It is like the fine line on getting a cold when your immune system cant decide whether or not to catch it. I wish I would hurry up and eitherbe fine or just lapse into a full blown panic attack. Sheesh. The decisions I have to make.

Peepers made out like a bandit for Christmas - mostly much needed clothes. I got two pairs of slippers and jammies and a whole bunch of other stuff and Zac was spoiled with woodworking tools. Ugh...I have been staying up waaaaaaay too late while on vacation. It is wearing me down. Yesterday night I was actually in bed at 10pm but my sister kept me up until 2am. I will be very happy to be in my own quiet bed again.

Went to the wood carving store the other day with mom, panini and zac... Zac about had a coronary when we walked in. Then Zac was hungry and there was a littly Gyro hut in the parking lot. Was horrible. Too much curry. Pita Pit will always rule for gyros. The best are when you are actually in Europe, but Pita Pit is the next best thing I guess. I tend to go more for the tzatziki sauce than anything else. Bring on the tzatziki!!

Been thinking how wierd it is to be an American. We as a country have no traditional costume, no traditional foods that actually started in this country, no traditional customs that started in this country.... Look at places like Hungry or Slovakia or even Norway - they all have those things because they are all the same kind of people. Here we are a mutt country. I guess that is what some people think is so great about America, that our national costume is every costume of the world. The only thing we have is the National Anthem. Oh and I read the declaration of independece today... I'm not sure why we still have it...America is nothing like what is outlined in the document. Made me quite sad because the original country sounded lovely. (as you can see deep thoughts have been plaguing me..)

Wish I had a time machine. I would love love love to see what life was like back in any era. I think I would go to 1100 ad first. England because it was a little more settled as in "not-so-roman"...just to see the dresses and the way life really was. Its hard for me to think that we actually know so much about those times and sometimes wonder who is embellishing the details. The next stop would be the dark ages... then the 1700's france and germany. O hell, I'd go everywhere. I would like to experience even a little of the life of history. I dont think I would go to biblical times or before that... that era just doesnt hold any interest for me. Actually come to think of it, that part of the world doesnt hold much interest for me. O well. But if I had a time machine I think I would just have it so that I was invisible to the people there so I would not alter history. That could be bad...I've seen movies :)

All of Zacs family was sick today - I know Zac wont get sick, I probably wont but I am really hoping Peepers doesnt get sick. Especially on the day that we are supposed to drive home. Hope the weather is good.

Oye. Ring you blasted phone! That I may drive forth and retrieve yon husband then retire to my bedside to sleep and awaken to a new morning. (thats about as Shakespearian I can get tonight.) I found my dad's old works of Shakespeare book (1000+ pages!). I remember as a girl I'd read through that book like my life depended on it. I like Shakespeare. He was really a funny guy if you understand dry, british, medival humor...and some humor there isnt that hard to understand either. It is like Chaucer's Canterbury Tales - its a riot if you can understand the way they talk!! One of my favorite books.

According to the weather lyers reporters, we are supposed to get 6 inches of snow overnight here in the Treasure Valley. This coming to us from the same people who brought us the news that a huge storm front was coming right on top of us monday night...Its been over 40 degrees this past week as a high. Seriously doubting the snow.

I remember why I like blogging so much - it is a fast way for me to yak on and on about my thoughts and then that way I feel like I already told someone what I was thinking so then I stop talking so dang much. Theraputic too..helps anxiety a little.

Pretty excited to go to work on the 3rd!! I finally am back in the dance world and I get to work with one of my best friends! I got my tap shoes and jazz shoes - have to order my grecians, but that wont take long. I am curious to see who I am teaching. At Kennedy's I used to teach girls that I watched grow up so I knew what they were capable of... These are new girls (and boys) (and adults) so we'll see. Uber stoked.

So I was looking thorugh good ol' facebook this evening to pass the time - looked at all the people from highshcol that had profiles. Really interesting to note that the people who looked like dumb bimbos back then still do today. And it is interesting to see who got married to who and how on earth did that happen??

I feel like I am getting slightly delirious...hellllloooo 12:23am!! But alas I have nothing better to do right now. Well, I guess I'll leave off here so I dont end up writing a russian novel.

We made it to Idaho!

Well we got through the 8 hour trip over the cascades and the blue mountains without incident. Peepers was a total angel the entire time - slept for half of it. It was way icy but that littel car handled it jsut fine. Good investment.

It is nice to be "home". I love my parents house - especially around the holidays. Its so fun and its great seeing them again. It is so nice to have both sets of parents in the same town. We dont have to decide who were goin to see on what holiday. Peepers and I are home based at my parents and hubs is being a transient between places.

It is finally starting to feel more like Christmas. We decorated the tree today - late for us, but better than never right?? Its snowing here, nice change. But I still hate Idaho snow. Its dirty.

I'm pretty darn tired. I am starting to relax now that I have some time on my hands. Peepers is loving all the grandparent attention he is getting.

I still have to figure out christmas presents. Have a feeling everyone is getting homemade rice-hot packs. Well this post is cut short - I have to go meet hubs now... I'll finish this up tomorrow.

Lazy Tuesday???

My days really fly now. I dont have any sense of time anymore. I bought a calendar but if it werent for my computer telling me what day it was I'd be screwed. January cant come soon enough. I start bringing in an income again. Some days I wonder what it would be like to be priveleged. Like Paris Hilton or Ivanka Trump. What do they worry about? What designer handbag goes with the designer shoes they're wearing? I'm sure they dont worry about where the next truck payment is going to come from, or how to budget so you still have gas money to get to the grocery store. I've always wondered why I wasnt born into that kind of life. Perhaps it was to keep me humble? Hmmm... well, looks like I'll have to make my own life of priveliedge. Etsy here I come!

What age do kids stop taking naps? Pierce is getting harder and harder to put down for a nap. It doesnt help that Zac had to use the bathroom really bad - which requires one to walk through Pierces bedroom (aka laundry room) - only 20 minutes after I put him down. So we got him up for a bit and gave him some green olives and put him back down - I can still hear him.

I'm speculating on whether or not I'm prego right now... I dont have any of the signs I remember, but my top half is excessivly sore. Maybe just a horrible PMS symptom. Were not trying right now, but if I were to be prego we'd welcome it.

Ever have anxiety about something that needs to be done? So much so that you freeze and dont do it? This is something that I am trying to overcome. I have a very important thing to do, but I cant un-freeze to do it. I dont know why. And it's just a phone call away. I just can't do it. Any ideas?

Was finally going to be able to get to church las Sunday - got sick instead. I got pounded with a head cold. I'm starting to feel better but still not 100%.

We started trying out the Eat Right for Your Blood Type Diet - oh I feel so good!!! I'm Type O therefore I flourish on meat and seafood. Type O is the most common in the world - its no wonder the Atkins and South Beach Diet worked so well for most of America, they are high protien low carb diets which is perfect for Type O's. And I'll bet you anything that it was the Type A people who were the ones touting it. They are the ones who can't digest meat at all - therefore it wouldnt work. If you get a chance to read that book I highly reccomend it!!! I've known about it for awhile, I just never tried it. Already have lost weight.

I feel like I'm missing something by not going to work. It feels like I'm lazing my days away and not providing any use of myself. I know that will change come January, but for now I feel jsut about useless. I get coming down off of amost 10 years of 8-5 workdays plus commute is like having cigarette withdrawals. (i'm guessing, Ive never had cigarette withdrawals.)

I want to take naps but I cant- I cant relax fully yet so I end up just laying there contemplating life and getting myself in a horrible mood.

I've really got to start getting to choreographing - I started but my stupid headcold is inhibiting me from doing any sudden movements. I think by tomorrow I will be ok. I need an office. I just need a room that is my space wehre I can get business done with no interruptions. Right now my office is in our loft which is serving as our bedroom while the weather is freezing. The loft also happens to look over the living room and kitchen so there is no privacy and no quiet. I'd use the other bedroom aside from the fact that it averages about 10 degrees warmer that whatever it is outside. So roughly 22-40 degrees fahrenheit. I suppose I will suffer the noise.

Had our ward Christmas party last Friday - was one of the nicest I've been to. Thankfully the RS pres. is one of my friends and has very good taste so it was a classy and elegant event. No "potluck-ishness" about it and we didnt have to sing the 12 days of Christmas while acting out each day looking like retards. I hated that. That kind of stuff is not fun for me... so dont ask me to do it. Unless you get me reaaaaaaallly drunk.

Well so far thats it for today, I'm moopy and anxious and just really dont know what to do with myself.